pandemic cooking

Stay The Fuck Home And Make Pie Edition

My all time favourite thing is pie. It can be sweet pie. It can be savoury pie. As long as it is pie! My favourite sweet pie is blueberry. YUM YUM! After that, peach then strawberry. I even like a good strawberry rhubarb pie, but DO NOT try to give me a rhubarb or raisin pie. I detest raisins.

I grew up in a household where every Sunday night we would have pie as dessert. My mom would make her pies mostly with seasonal fruit. Every once in a while, she would make a killer lemon meringue. My Mom learned to make pie from my Grandma Betty (my Dad’s mom) and I then learned to make pie from both my Mom and also Grandma Betty. My Grandma Betty was the queen of baking.

All of the below recipes can be easily veganized.

Mom’s Pie Crust! It is the flakiest pie crust you will make. The trick is and you CANNOT skip this step, is you must add the vinegar! I’m not sure about variations for replacing shortening.

This recipe makes 2 pie crusts.

2 cups of flour
3/4 cups of vegetable shortening
pinch of salt
4 TBSP Cold water (the colder the better)
1 TSP White Vinegar. (this is the only vinegar that will work)

In a large bowl add the flour, shortening and salt.

In a small bowl add the cold water and vinegar together.

With a pastry cutter or two forks cut into the flour and shortening until it is crumbly.

Once it is crumbly add the water, a few tablespoons at a time. If you find your mixture too dry, add more water. Make sure you only add a bit at a time.

Don’t over mix, otherwise your crust will be tough.

Roll out as desired!

Fruit Pies

Blueberry Pie https://sallysbakingaddiction.com/best-blueberry-pie/
Apple Pie https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/12682/apple-pie-by-grandma-ople/
Strawberry Pie https://joythebaker.com/2015/04/strawberry-lattice-pie/
Strawberry Rhubarb Pie
https://www.bonappetit.com/recipe/best-strawberry-rhubarb-pie
Lemon Meringue Pie https://www.veganosity.com/vegan-lemon-meringue-pie-with-aquafaba/
Cherry Pie https://www.inspiredtaste.net/22872/easy-cherry-pie-recipe/
Pecan Pie https://chocolatecoveredkatie.com/vegan-pecan-pie-recipe/
Chocolate Cream Pie https://pinchofyum.com/vegan-chocolate-pie
Pumpkin Pie https://minimalistbaker.com/vegan-gluten-free-pumpkin-pie/
Vintage Pie recipes https://antiquealterego.com/2014/06/20/vintage-recipes-1950s-pies/

Savoury Pies

Pot Pie https://www.acouplecooks.com/savory-vegan-pot-pie-with-sage-crust/
Onion Pie
https://www.connoisseurusveg.com/vegan-cheese-onion-pie/
A list of ideas! https://happyhappyvegan.com/vegan-pie/

What is your favourite pie?

Stay The Fuck Home And Use Up All Of Those Frozen Banana’s Edition

Raise your hand if half of your freezer is frozen banana’s. Let’s get those hands up. Yes, you in the back, get that hand up!

Chocolate Covered Katie has an amazing blog post that has many recipes for banana, go give it a read. The recipes are delectable. If you are just looking for one or two recipes, below are a few of my favourites.

Smoothies are possibly the number one thing I use my frozen bananas for. I make them several times a week. Sooooooo goood for you! If you want something basic, a banana oatmeal smoothie is a good option.

Banana Bread is my second go to for frozen bananas. The below video is not only a great recipe, but the host of Rainbow Plant Life is a lot of fun!

Banana Chocolate Chip Squares are as close to a healthy dessert as you are going to get! Please don’t eat the whole pan at once!
https://itdoesnttastelikechicken.com/vegan-chocolate-chip-banana-squares/

Banana Pancakes are soooooo yum with real maple syrup! Also, the trick to fluffy pancakes is don’t overmix the batter! You are welcome! https://avirtualvegan.com/vegan-banana-pancakes/

Banana Muffins are one of my favourite things to have for breakfast. https://minimalistbaker.com/vegan-banana-crumb-muffins/

Breakfast Cookies are a great thing to have if you need to take something with you on your walk. This recipe has raisins, which I HATE, so I swap them out for dried cranberries or dried blueberries. https://beamingbaker.com/easy-vegan-peanut-butter-banana-breakfast-cookies-gluten-free-v-df-one-bowl/

Banana Cream Pie is such a decadent treat. We all need a decadent treat right now!
https://minimalistbaker.com/banana-cream-pie-vegan-gf/

Banana Popsicle’s are such a nice summer treat. Plus, you can buy Popsicle moulds at the dollar store!

Banana Nicecream is something I am looking forward to making once it warms up. Mind you icecream is a nice treat all year long!

Stay The Fuck Home Potato Potato Edition!

Due to COVID there is apparently an over abundance of potatoes in storage right now and due to this the cost of buying them at a fruit stand or grocer should be a lot cheaper than in past. So… let’s get out there and buy us some potatoes.

Believe it or not, there are a lot of people who don’t know how to cook potatoes. I know. I know. It’s something that seems relatively easy, yet, can be frustrating all the same. I am posting a few links to potato cooking basics and a few fancy recipes for those who have their tater skills down.

Roast https://www.spendwithpennies.com/simple-herb-oven-roasted-potatoes/

Baked https://www.thekitchn.com/how-to-bake-a-potato-in-the-oven-165615

French Fries https://smittenkitchen.com/2017/03/easiest-french-fries/

Potato Wedges

Scalloped

Shepherd’s Pie

Curry Shepherd’s Pie https://www.bosh.tv/recipes/curry-shepherds-pie

Potato Buns This one an be easily veganized.

Stay The Fuck Home And Bake Cookies Edition

Now that all purpose flour is returning to shelves, why not bake something that isn’t bread. Everyone deserves a treat! Many of the ingredients of the cookies I’m listing below are likely in your cupboards.

Chocolate Chip are a classic! I don’t know anyone who doesn’t like a good cookie with melty chocolate bits!
https://itdoesnttastelikechicken.com/vegan-oatmeal-chocolate-chip-cookies/

Breakfast Cookies. If anyone tells you, you cannot have cookies for breakfast… well, you don’t need those kind of people in your life! Afterall, it says BREAKFAST cookie!
https://www.mydarlingvegan.com/gluten-free-vegan-breakfast-cookies/

Peanut Butter Cookies are one of my all time favourite cookies. How can you go wrong!
https://lovingitvegan.com/crunchy-vegan-peanut-butter-cookies/

Thumb Print Cookies are a fun cookie to make with your kids! https://veganhuggs.com/jam-vegan-thumbprint-cookies/

No Bake Cookies are perfect if you don’t want to turn on the oven!
https://detoxinista.com/vegan-no-bake-cookies/

Oatmeal Cookies were my least favourite cookie growing up because they always had raisin. Once I learned how to bake, I would make them and leave out the raisins or add chocolate chips. Raise your hand if you hate raisins.
https://beamingbaker.com/simple-easy-vegan-oatmeal-cookies-gf/

Stay The Fuck Home The Seitanic Edition

Since everyone is buying up all of the Vital Wheat Gluten so they can make their own bread flour, and bread flour will likely start hitting the shelves again…. well, you are going to have a lot of Vital Wheat Gluten in your pantry. Time for you to learn how to make Seitan. As a bonus, I’m including one of my recipes.

First… what is Seitan (aka Wheat Meat). Wheat Meat isn’t a new thing, it’s been around for centuries and has been used in Asian dishes for just as long. The term Seitan is newer and yes, it’s pronounced the same as Satan!

Why eat Seitan? It punches a protein punch. 1/2 a cup of Seitan has 46 grams of protein in it. It’s easy to make and is a great meat substitute, plus, as I said earlier… for those of you who hoarded it, you are going to need to use it up eventually!

Let’s make Seitan!

First you will need to create a large ring with salt. Next draw a pentagram in the middle of that circle. In the middle of the pentagram place a white candle… Oops! Sorry, right… we aren’t summoning Satan… making Seitan. Get it together Lizzie!

Here are some really fun videos and recipes! Also, get your kids involved. This will be fun for them!

Basic Seitan Recipe https://simpleveganblog.com/seitan/

Seitan Steak (I made this recently and it was delish!) https://itdoesnttastelikechicken.com/vegan-seitan-steak/

Seitan Tenders (yes, I show a lot of It Doesn’t Taste Like Chicken recipes — they are basic ingredients and easy to follow!)
https://itdoesnttastelikechicken.com/vegan-seitan-tenders/

Seitan Nuggets – McDonald’s Inspired (kids will love this one)
https://www.theedgyveg.com/2014/03/08/vegan-mcdonalds-series-mcnuggets/

Instant Pot Seitan

Seitan Sausage
https://www.veggierose.com/post/2017/12/06/easy-vegan-sausage

Lizzie’s Seitan Sausage Recipe

Makes 4 medium-sized sausages or 6 small.  For more sausages, double or triple the recipe.

Preparation 20 minutes

Cook Time 45/50 mins

Tools: Potato masher, Bowl, Tinfoil, Steamer basket, large pot to steam with (can also be done in an Instant Pot), Standmixer (or hand knead until gluten strings form when you pull it apart)

1 Cup black beans (for the best flavour)
¼ Cup vegetable broth
1 TBSP olive oil or neutral oil of choice
1 ½ TBSP soy sauce or coconut aminos or tamari sauce
1 TBSP red miso
2 TSP smoked paprika
1 TSP fennel seeds

1 TSP cumin seeds
1 TSP black pepper
1 TSP red chili flakes
1 TSP garlic powder
1 TSP onion powder

1/3 can Jackfruit (in water or brine, do not use the one in syrup) (make sure to shred/pull apart the Jackfruit pieces)
3 TBSP nutritional yeast (I sometimes add a bit extra to boost the flavour)
1 TBSP potato starch

2 TBSP Chickpea flour

¾ Cup vital wheat gluten + 2 TBSP

In a large bowl or standmixer bowl place the black beans and with a potato masher to mash them until they are creamy (it’s ok to have some beans that aren’t completely mashed).

Add the broth, oil, soy sauce, shredded Jackfruit  and miso. Stir well to combine.

Add the smoked paprika, fennel, cumin, black pepper, garlic powder, onion powder and red chili (and other spice combos you choose). Stir well to combine.

Add the nutritional yeast, potato starch, chickpea flour, and vital wheat gluten to the bowl and stir until it is all thoroughly combined. If you are using a stand mixer, use the dough hook and knead until gluten strings have begun to form.

If mixing by hand, when it gets too hard to stir, get in there with your hands and knead. Knead till you see it slightly stringy (this is the gluten working)

Let rest for approximately 5 minutes.

Quarter the batter, and form each section into a sausage shape. Make sure to pack the dough tightly as you shape it.

Wrap tightly in a sheet of aluminum foil, and wrap the ends to seal the sausage inside.

Repeat with all of the sausage dough. I also give them a roll on the table, after they have been wrapped, to even out the shape.

Prepare your steam basket. Once steaming, add the sausages, and steam for 45 minutes. 

If you are using an Instant Pot, steam for 40 minutes, then do a 10-minute natural release and then release the rest of the steam. Make sure you have at least 1 cup of water in the Instant Pot pot before you steam.

Allow them to cool to room temperature.

Once cooled, place the sausages, still wrapped in aluminum, in the fridge to firm for 3 to 5 hours or overnight (this is especially important if you plan to grill them — I usually leave them overnight)

You can reheat, grill, sauté, cook, or do whatever you want with them.