weight loss

Day 8

Day 8! I’m really loving Yoga With Adriene. I’ve never had an instructor quite like her. She is amazing. Today’s practice was about healing. Something I’m trying to do right now.

Last night I had a dream about a crow. It was mad at me and was flying around and following me, telling me that. I couldn’t figure out why or what I’d done to make it mad. When a crow appears in your dreams and it’s flying and following you it means that you need to let go and move forward. This dream and Adriene’s lesson today go hand in hand.

I lost two friends this year. One was a toxic friendship that I finally walked away from for the final time. The second was a beloved friend who we all lost to cancer. In one situation I am grieving deeply. My friend was young and restarting her life and cancer is a horrible, horrible disease. In the other situation, in the beginning, I was mad at myself for letting it go on for so long. The friendship was unhealthy for both parties. It was a good thing to walk away, but I still beat myself up over it when I shouldn’t have. Today I realized I need to heal from not only my friend who died but from the toxic friendship I ended. It’s also ok to talk about it, because… this girl… doesn’t like to do that.

Today’s photo is of a ghost. I believe in ghosts. I write ghost stories. We all have emotional ghosts. It’s ok to tell them to go to the other side.

Size Beautiful

I really wish someone would start a campaign called ‘Size Beautiful’.  A campaign to teach women to love their bodies no matter what size or shape they are.  Society has us so brainwashed into thinking we have to be a size zero to be accepted, that we will starve ourselves to look that way and this has to STOP!  I’m a curvy girl. I’m smart, attractive, creative and most importantly healthy.  I’m NOT a SIZE!  I refuse to be a SIZE!  When someone asks me what size I am, I always say ‘I’m this size.’ Women all around the world also need to stop being sizes!  Be healthy!

I’m a recovering Bulimic.  I suffered in my teens and twenties, because I also thought I needed to be a certain ‘size’.  In the process I screwed up my metabolism and my health.  I’ve since fixed my physical health and hopefully most of my mental health since accepting I’m not a ‘size’.  We place so much importance on size that we forget the most important things are being healthy and taking care of ourselves.  As a curvy girl and a Vegan, I constantly get this question.  ‘You’re a Vegan, but you aren’t….. (they pause because they can’t say it, SKINNY).  I always respond, ‘I’m Vegan and I eat well.’  I have an incredibly healthy diet, I am active (though no athlete) and have no health issues, my body isn’t meant to be thin, or muscular or any other shape than this shape. I’m proud that to be this shape. I LOVE that I have curves.

There was a time when society coveted curvy women.  Marilyn Monroe, Jane Russell, Mae West and Jayne Mansfield were idolized by all. Women wanted to be like them and men wanted them.  These women couldn’t keep men out of their beds. When did this stop?  It never should have. Where along the way did society stop believing that women shouldn’t have curves?  We need to take a step back, look at woman as a woman, not as some image a magazine portrays as what a woman needs to look like.  If you are one of those people who won’t date, befriend or love a woman because of her size, try looking beyond the package and you will see you are missing out on being with a fabulous human being.  You are missing out on someone who is beautiful both inside and out.  I grew up being told over and over again by my father that everyone is beautiful, no matter what their packaging is.  I never used to ‘get it’, but I do now.  He’s right.

Wait!  Wait one darn minute!  Why am I waiting for someone else to start this campaign?  Let’s all start it right here, right now! Stop being a size. Start being healthy.  Be size beautiful.