There really should be a special section of Craigslist for people like me… am in one of those moods (as in I may start drinking soon) and couldn’t help myself. Like my Zombie Girl dating ad I placed over a year ago, I’m taking bets on how many serious responses I get. Trust me… there will be someone out there who actually thinks this is for reals…
… At least I made myself laugh for two minutes.
Here it is. I placed it in Missed Connections…
Wanna team up? – w4m
Date: 2011-08-17, 11:08AM EDT
You: 5’8″, handsome. Dark curly hair, haunting dark brown eyes. A smile that could end a million year war. You were wearing a white t-shirt, jeans, carrying a machete and a sawed off shot gun. You were covered in blood and Zombie bits.
Me: 5’8″, curvy. Red hair, part hair dye, part Zombie brain remnants. I was wearing a Smith’s t-shirt, rolled up jeans and boots, carrying a AK47 and a satchel of food.
Last seen: Bloor line, underground tunnel – somewhere between Spadina and Bathurst. I went east, you went west.
Let’s team up and fight these Zombies together. I’m almost out of bullets and have food. You look hungry and seem handy with that machete.
/ps here is the link. Not sure how long it will stay live. Am sure it will get flagged soon as not being a real ad…
Thought i’d never hear from you again…food is scarce in these parts..
I might have grown a few inches since the last time we met, but i’m sure you’ll be able to recognize me.
I’m holed up in the west, in Etobicoke, have enough food for a few days more and then I must venture out or be too weak to keep up.
My machete stinks of rotting flesh and coupled with the cries and moans of the dead, it really is hard getting any rest at all. I can grab an AK off a dead soldier on my way to you, if he hasn’t ‘woken up’
already but I fear it might only slow me down. The machete is, after all, my weapon of choice.
First of all; best post ever! Secondly, get out.of the tunnel quick. You can get quickly surrounded and outnumbered.